Awfully quiet around here

Oh, my friends. All those dreams, all those plans. Then reality hit in the form of (since January)...

...House purchase delayed for one week
...House painting, cleaning, floor installation - in 10 days or less
...Move
...10 days in new house during which we could not walk on new floor
...Week long delay in moving internet and phone
...Unpacking
...Weekly overnight trips for loving husband
...Family trip to Vienna
...Colds for me and Pumpkin
...Flat tire on the bicycle
...Grandparents arrive from North Carolina
...Birthday celebration (Pumpkin is 2!)
...Record-breaking 7 days of illness during which each and every member of our extended household gets sick and stays sick for at least 5 days. Each.

We're still in the middle of that last one. I'm just starting to feel like I might one day get a grip on things again - like life might one day be something other than a series of life-changing events. It just might be possible that there's a year or two in a row somewhere in our future that doesn't involve a move or a new job or new school or new family member. They're all wonderful things, but it would also be nice to catch a breath and take a minute to enjoy it all, too.

For now, let's take a minute an enjoy a house that's more than less unpacked. A house that's full of people I love - three generations of them, no less. A house that's going to be ours for a nice long while. A house where we can all stay in our pajamas for, say, three or four days in a row. Oh yes, and this yummy cup of honey lemon tea that will surely kick the doo-wop out of my cough!

Summer evenings...

We had a shocking development tonight. Two children were in bed at 7:30. Two children were asleep in their beds at 7:30. We went sat out on the balcony with coffee and date walnut cake and enjoyed the moment, talked about life, talked about changes coming and going, and took just a few deep breaths. Then we went inside and responsible Papa discovered Pumpkin, screaming in her crib, just out of hearing range. And thus ended our blissful evening...

But it didn't end before a few minutes of very important and thought-provoking discussion. We manage this every once in a while. It's the "who do you want to be when you grow up" talk. This year has been a hard and fascinating journey. I went from working mom to stay-at-home mama. "Mama" seems more appropriate now. I feel more connected to my mama-ness now. More connected to my children, my family, and our needs. I'm learning that this work is not about accomplishing or crossing-things on a list, but about trying (and it is so hard) to be present and flexible.

It's been hard to find my own path on this journey. There are plenty of people who inspire me. Some of them I know personally. Others, I admire at a distance. It's taken time to realize that our family's path will be different than all of theirs and that it will work and that it will be alright. It's taken time for me to realize that my path will be different from the one I dreamed of and that it will work and that it will be alright. So maybe that's me giving me permission to breathe more often.

One thing's for sure - I'm giving myself permission to blog without pictures. I'm terrible at taking them regularly. I'm terrible at uploading them. But I enjoy the writing. I enjoy the community. I enjoy the discussion. It's lovely, even without pictures.

Polar Expedition

This weekend we went to the Polar Adventure Day at the Northerly Island hosted by the Chicago Park District. They promised hot cocoa, sled dogs, and ice sculpture and they delivered. One of the nicest things about the event was that they weren't selling anything. There were no booths, crafts, vendors, food, etc. Just a nice outdoor experience. The Northerly Island is just south of Adler Planetarium. To my surprise, it's a relatively unused public park area right on the lake. Most folks probably get to the museums and figure there isn't much more to see. I'm glad we had an excuse to go a bit further.

Peanut had a great time. He got his first taste of hot cocoa, which he loved. There's nothing funnier than a toddler nursing a coffee cup. He refused to let anyone else hold it as long as there might be liquid at the bottom. Getting a picture without chocolate mug in front of his face took some work. It wasn't only food, though. We also saw some animals, including a barn owl that he's still talking about. I've been making up animal stories for him at nap time and night and one is about an owl family. His eyes are even bigger now when he listens. The other animal that made a big impression was the hedgehog, also related to a story we've been reading, The Happy Hedgehog Band. The adults were a little more taken with the ant eater, but that's not particularly polar, is it?

My favorite discovery was a set of three beautiful metal sculptures dancing out on the snow covered peninsula. We were bundled up in layers and thermals, but these ladies by Dessa Kirk made me think of spring. The Chicago winter isn't as bad as I expected, but thoughts of trees budding and green shoots of grass are starting to invade my imagination, nevertheless.

My hat is one I made (quickly) for myself after losing one earlier this winter. It's made from Malabrigo worsted, a yarn I would live in if possible. Details here. Judging from the pictures, it should be called the Conehead Hat!

Young Tar Heel

Grandfather and grandson in UNC shirts. It's a sight to bring a little tear of joy to any Tar Heel's eyes. Of course, later on at dinner grandson's mom asked me what Tar Heels are, but that's OK. He's not heading off to university (or study abroad) for at least another 16, 17 years. I've got plenty of time to convince him that it's the southern part of heaven. Or at least to get a kick out of him in his pint-sized gear.

By the way, check out that garden shed. Yes, it's a garden shed. When I grew up, years and years ago in South Dakota, sheds were metal slap up jobbies with dirt floors and dark, scary insides. I was a kid, after all. This one is pure luxury. Real wood, finely finished, concrete floors, electricity, running water, and beautiful glass windows! Would make a fine guest house. Probably not bad for storing garden tools, either.